The Delight of Being Seen

Once upon a not terribly long ago, I excelled at hiding in plain sight.

Hair tied up, hat pulled low.

Smile locked up, eyes cast down.

I didn’t want to be seen. I was thirteen flavours of miserable, and pretending otherwise was energy I didn’t want to muster unless I absolutely had to.

Being seen felt like swallowing razorblades.

I wasn’t proud of what was on display.

Self-love was a martini shaken with rotten eggs, stirred with despair.

So I hid myself. Shrouded my inner world. I didn’t want to share the mess. I didn’t want to project the heaviness I felt onto others. I didn’t want to reveal my pain.

———

Feeling truly, fully seen as who I am is one of the most profound, soothing, gratifying, and rare emotional experiences I’ve encountered in my lifetime.

The difficult dance is that not everyone in your life can see you in full.

Some will be locked into who you were, before you grew in new ways. This is a reflection of their growth, or lack thereof. 

Some can only see you through the narrow lens of who they want you to be to them.

Some will only see bits and pieces of you; never the full picture.

So you’re surrounded by a medley of people who see you as you once were, who see you as they want to believe, who only see bits and pieces of you…

And those who see everything about you.

The latter are the most precious of gems.

Hold onto them. 

Treasure them.

Polish them.

———

Being seen isn’t just a matter of others’ perception.

To be seen by others, you have to allow yourself to be seen.

Every unique, strange, messy, glorious detail that makes you who you are.

No hiding.

Hair down, hat off.

Smile wide, eyes up.

Letting yourself be seen can be scary. Especially if you’re revealing new parts.

And so the difficult dance returns:

Will you continue hiding yourself from the world?

Or show yourself in full, and accept the world’s response?

———

These days, I take delight, pleasure, and joy in being seen.

Life has been a blooming bouquet of roses since I relaxed into that posture.

I share my music with the world. I don’t bite my tongue in conversations. I dress and present myself in ways that feel like home, norms be damned. I say “no” a lot more.

Which has triggered a gradual, unforced reorganization of the people around me.

Old connections have stepped closer, while others have changed shape or faded away. The new connections are the most aligned and natural-feeling of my life. 

So hats—and masks—off, my friend.

Let your hair down, whatever that means to you.

When you let yourself be seen, in full, your people will find you.

With love from the forest,

~ Alexander

P.S. Being seen starts with seeing yourself clearly—every unique, strange, messy, glorious detail. Only then can you express yourself fully. This is the kind of inner work we tend to in Mythic Alchemy. If you feel the call to walk together, I’d be honoured.